It’s the morning after the night before and I’m sat here with a coffee being pensive.  Isn’t it funny how when you’re out you see all these people laughing, dancing and having a good time but you can always spot one person who you know is thinking “What the hell am I doing here?” Reminds me of going out not particularly because I want to but because I want a distraction from the thoughts that constantly swarms my head.

Ever been surrounded by people, going out and meeting up regularly but still feel lonely? I can see in my head a picture with me in clear focus surrounded by people wearing bright colours all smiling/laughing but they’re all blurred and moving in slow motion and I’m “greyed” out. Their laughter is muffled.

What does it mean to be happy? Does it mean having the material things you want? Being the life of the party? Having loads of money? Being in love? Do we depend on people to make us happy or are we responsible for our own happiness? I’m still trying to figure out this happiness thing. I don’t know if I’m happy or not. It’s a strange ole feeling…one of indifference…the colour grey…”zombiefied”.

There’s the whole Cognitive Behaviour Therapy, Neuro Linguistic Programming, Meditation, Hypnosis and all these other “things” you can do to “train” yourself to elevate your mental state. What about happiness au naturel? Is life sucking our joy out of us? The more I talk to people lately, the more I hear how unhappy they are because they hate their jobs, they’re in debt, they’re struggling to pay their bills, etc. Then they go on holiday, turn into lobsters, get alcohol and/or food poisoning and come back and the moaning continues.

We’ve become so closed that we now resort to games consoles and internet dating in order to be happy. We’re losing the capacity to be social and this is evident in our behaviour when we do occasionally venture out to get air. Ok, imagine this…there’s a social gathering, let’s say a group of people sat around a table in a bar or restaurant. How many of them are on their phones checking their Facebook or Twitter updates or sending text messages? How many mobile phones will be on the table? You see, even when we’re out as a group we still can’t socialise. We may as well sit around the table and “talk” via text , Twitter or Facebook! I’ll admit I’m guilty of this sometimes but I find it interesting that our children will grow up thinking this kind of social interaction is the norm.

I interact with children daily and it’s sad but some children don’t even know how to play with each other, how to be imaginative and creative through play. They come out of their shells when you put a Wii console, Xbox or PlayStation in front of them. What does the future hold for these precious fragile minds?

Because I don’t want my brain to explode I’m going to stop moaning and try something a mate suggested I do daily. List ten things I’m grateful for:

1. My daughter…The one true love of my life!

2. Being alive (I’ve often debated this one)

3. Having friends (debated this one too…feel like I’m a friend of convenience sometimes)

4. Having somewhere to live

5. Not going hungry

6. Having a job

7. Being warm

8. Being healthy and having all my limbs and teeth in good working order

9. Being loved (even if only by my daughter 🙂 )

10. Having internet connection! (hypocrite! haha :D)

That wasn’t easy. You should try it. Something that seems so trivial. By the time I got to number 6 I was struggling. Anyway, have a good day and stay dry. One love.


2 thoughts on “Happy?

  1. Hi Damien, really like your blog, and the photos, they are great. What camera do you use? Yes, I’m not sure I am happy either really, but I am not very unhappy either. My gran suggested I live through a world war, then I would know what it is to feel really happy, and put my worries into perspective! As I can’t do that, I have recently taken up running. It really got the Endorphins (“endogenous morphine”) flowing and I felt pretty amazing. Sadly, I have had to put the running on a backburner, as my ankle has locked up (probably from my tendons and ligaments going into shock!) . However, I definitely recommend it, and hope to be running up Brighton Road again soon!


  2. Pingback: Every Cloud… | Damiology

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